Posts Tagged ‘Add new tag’
THOR’s DAY RANT: Sotomayor Says- white is the new black!
Written by Troglodad
Thursday, 28 May 2009 21:50
1 Comment

Our country sure has come a long way. Unfortunately, it’s in the wrong direction.

I remember when cowboy movies had the good guys in white hats, and the bad guys in black. Back then I never would have guessed it was a racial dig on black people. And then George Lucas had to mix things up, putting Stormtroopers in white, and Darth Vader- who becomes a Good Guy in Return of the Jedi- in black. Movie colors got all mixed up.

I don’t know why it surprised me, but I was shocked to see a story yesterday about Supreme Court-nominee Sotomayor stating that "I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experiences would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn't lived that life." Wow.

It got me wondering- does she wear white sheets on the weekend, or perhaps red, white and green ones? Of course, she wouldn’t be caught dead wearing white, as that’s the new target of hate.

Don’t get me wrong about the whole Latinos-vs-whites thing. White Europeans did come to the Americas and interbreed with and brutalize the Native Americans throughout Central and South America. I can understand a little animosity there. Even though that was what, centuries ago? And all those people are long dead…

But the last people I would expect to embrace/nominate any racism would be African Americans.

Think about it, throughout the 1700s and into the 1800s, blacks were treated pretty damned poorly in the Southeastern United States. They were traded, owned and controlled like cattle. And when they did finally get liberated, the harsh treatment continued- slavery being replaced by segregation. We’re less than a hundred years into a truly integrated society where people really are created equal, and treated equally. Yet, Obama has not only embraced an apparent racist, he wants to put her smug ass in the Supreme Court.

I have to echo if a white man said something similar, he would be run out of town. Sotomayor’s logic sets a dangerous precedent. I only wish she could be hoisted on her own petard.

For example, if Latina women are smarter than white men, where do Orientals fall on the scale? Can we assume she agrees with Japanese racists, and that all Americans are not only fat and lazy, but inferior to the Japanese? Shouldn’t we then put Judge Lance Ito on the Supreme Court? He did a bang-up job on the OJ Simpson case.

And if there’s truth to the idea that race determines things like intelligence, then we have to also consider that other attributes, like, I don’t know, athleticism, must also be racially determined. I guess that means no more Larry Byrds playing basketball.

Maybe Judge Sotomayor would like to make a ruling on siestas? Perhaps she in her infinite El Girly wisdom could see fit to make it unconstitutional to not allow people siestas at work. I know I could use a nap in my busy day. I guess since I’m not Hispanic I won’t get it though. While she’s at it, maybe Sotomayor could mandate that Native Americans never have to pay for alcoholic beverages again. You know, because they’re all drunks, gambling away their government checks in their reservation casinos.

What brand of soap does Sotomayor like to use? Does she wash away the rigors of the day with some Irish Spring, or maybe a bar of Hitler’s best mix from Auschwitz?

I wonder what Sotomayor’s beef is against us folks that are pigment-challenged? Did she lose out on a scholarship in her college years? Did some white person get government-mandated special treatment that she wanted? Or maybe she’s angry about all the white people that get extra points added to test scores on Federal jobs? Or that are bussed into different school districts so they can have a chance to more easily learn hip-hop?

More importantly, besides being branded dumber than Latina women, what is next for white men? Aside from buying white sheets and joining the skinheads?

Apparently, in the Maobama administration, rainbows encompass all colors…except white.

 
Saturday Review: Squire Boone Caverns
Written by Troglodad
Saturday, 23 May 2009 03:20
2 Comments

When it comes to caves, I think I’m going to choose my basement mancave over Squire Boone’s beloved Corydon caves.

In case you don’t know the history, Squire Boone and his more-famous brother, Daniel Boone, discovered the caves in Southern Indiana (Mauckport, near Corydon, to be exact) in the 1800s. They built a mill nearby. On one occasion, Indians, paid by the British to hassle folks on the frontier, were chasing Squire Boone and he hid from them in the caves, saving his life. Squire Boone so loved his caves that he wanted to be buried there.

I know all this ‘cause I chaperoned a field trip to the caves this week with my daughter’s school.

Call me soft- I’m definitely no frontiersman- but I don’t much care for Squire Boone’s caverns. Oh sure, they’re caverns, so they automatically get points in their favor, but I much prefer my own mancave.

First off, Squire Boone caverns are on a hill. Or maybe that’s in a hill? The point is that when you go, you’re going to be doing a lot of vertical hiking. From the slanted parking lot up to the gift shop, or down to the soap-making house, or candle-making house, or down to the Mill. See, there isn’t just a cavern to see, like in my youth. Nope, it’s a whole tribute to pioneer living. And that would be great- if it were on level ground. But I’m 41 years old and a fairly large guy. While I didn’t crack my head repeatedly on the high ceilings of the cavern like at Marengo Caves, I did find the up and downhill, back and forth hiking hard on my knees. Then we went underground.

Here’s an important safety advisory for anyone thinking of Squire Boone Caverns that has bad knees or is afraid of heights: Don’t Go.

When we went, the walk-in entrance was blocked off- this meant we got to do the 73 step-spiral staircase-from-hell to go down into the caverns, walk up and down many more stairs as we followed the guide, then turned around and climbed back out. I know, people laugh and say someone who’s 6 foot 4 inches tall shouldn’t be acrophobic, but I am. Especially when the metal stairs I am climbing flex under my wrassler-class weight.

Let’s compare my own mancave. It’s on level ground. One flight of stairs, that are strong enough to drive a car down, and carpeted. Maximum depth- one floor, not the 9 floors down that Squire Boone reaches at it’s deepest. My stairs are straight, too. No spiraling, no twisting, no turns. And dry, totally not slippery.

My mancave is drier- although I have to admit I like the cool dampness of caverns, it probably wouldn’t be good for my health in the long run. And while most caverns have electricity for lighting, well, there’s no TV. Point to my mancave and it's satellite goodness.

Solitude? 90 feet underground guarantees you probably wouldn’t hear a plane crash into the gift shop above, but I get decent sound-proofing from my mancave. No doors closing on cars, no cars-driving-by, no birds, no yelling kids outside. Basically then, anything more than one level underground is just unnecessary.

Did I get good pictures at Squire Boone Caverns? Yeah- more impressive than my GI Joe and movie memorabilia collection for sure. But given the strain on my knees to get there, I’ll contentedly stare at my bookshelves without any regrets.

Were the staff at Squire Boone helpful and nice? Absolutely. Great, friendly folks. If they were on level ground I’d go again. Several times.

All in all, I give Squire Boone 1 out of 5 stars. However, if you like climbing and dangerous heights, I’d boost the rating to 3 stars. All in all though, if you’re driving to Corydon to see a cave, I regretfully must recommend you go check out Marengo Caves. Even my 3 year old could handle that tour.  Just watch your head.

 
THOR’s Day Rant: Does Anyone Really Win?
Written by Troglodad
Thursday, 16 April 2009 14:09
3 Comments

I’m a sucker for online contests. I enter them all the time. Despite the fact I never win anything. And every time I lose, even though I fully expected it, I get mad. Then I begin to wonder- was any prize really given out?

My obsession with drawings started back in the 1980s, when a local car parts store was giving away a brand new Ford Ranger pickup truck. Entries were accepted at the store, by filling out a slip and putting it in a box, or by writing your information on a 3×5 business card. I opted for the latter. 658 times.

Yes, I actually sat at home and filled out 658 entries. I took them to the store and dropped them into the box slot in packs of 30 or so. It took awhile.

Looking back on it, I see that it was a colossal waste of time. More than likely, when that box was emptied, someone saw all those cards, probably stuck together, and took a bunch out.

After years of losing in virtually every contest I ever entered, I was about to give up when I stumbled across online entries. Lots of them. Never again would I have to hand write hundreds of entries. Better still, a lot of the contests have grand, first and second prizes.

And while I could be one of a hundred owners of a free t-shirt, there have been some pretty good grand prizes to lure me in. I particularly was interested in the special-edition Corvette given away as a Speed Racer (the movie) promotion. I knew I wouldn’t win- not even a poster- but I was really interested in seeing more pictures of the car. I was very crushed when I neither won nor was able to find anything out about the car.

You’d think that after all these years, I wouldn’t be disappointed when I fail to win a contest. But I am. One of the most disappointing was at Engadget.com. Instead of randomly drawing entries to determine a winner, they had a contest where you took a picture of your broke-down entertainment system. The most pathetic excuse for a home theater won a brand-spanking new home theater. I took my picture of my actual lame-o basement set up, titled "Daddy's 2×4 theater" and sent it in. I didn’t win.

In the Engadget case, I got to see the winner’s entry, but I waited and expected to see the winner send in a photo of the new stuff  once it was up and running. If I couldn’t win, at least I could live vicariously, ever-so-briefly, through their good fortune. And since they had the ability to send a picture in to enter the contest, it shouldn’t be too hard to send in an update.

But no.

In fact, it seems pretty near impossible to find any stories online of winners proudly displaying their loot. There are websites telling us poor schmucks how awful it is to win the lottery- showing the bad luck that has befallen lotto winners. But I can’t seem to find any sites sharing the goodness of a lucky win.

Why?

Especially in the case of contests where you have to send in an entry- how damn hard would it be to send in a thank you note later, maybe with a picture or two? People write reviews of products they buy, why not something you got for free? You’d think in all the thousands upon thousands of contests run year round, there would be somebody who would want to share.

This makes me wonder- is anyone really winning? I know most contests let you send off for a list of winners names. But that's just a name. I could get names out of a phone book.  I want to hear from the winner. I want a frickin’ testimonial about how great the prize they beat me out of is. Is that so much to ask? I’m not going to be mad at the winner. And I’m not asking them to post their address so some burglars can come clean them out. I just want something to pick me up out of the funk of losing.

Take Burn Notice’s annual contest. This great spy show on the USA network has given away 2 Saab convertibles now. You know, if I ever won a frickin’ car, I’d take a blue-million pictures of it. I’d pose the car to match scenes from the show. I’d do a whole virtual tour of the thing. Not to brag, but to share the fun of having won something.

Maybe it’s because I’m a giver. Literally. The only thing I have ever won in my life was an autographed basketball. It was at a charity event at Indiana University Southeast. I won a basketball signed by Bobby Knight and the whole IU coaching staff from that year. Ironically, I don’t like basketball.

That basketball sat in my closet, went with me all the way to Germany when I was stationed overseas. I didn’t display it or anything, I just liked keeping it around because it’s the only time I’ve ever won anything. But one day, I was talking with a friend of mine, and he was mentioning how he wished he could have bought one of the pieces of the IU basketball court when they redid it. Here was a diehard IU fan, who regularly wore IU logos, never missed a game, and absolutely loved the sport. He didn’t have a autographed basketball.

So I gave him mine.

Now, if I can give away the only damn thing I’ve ever won, can’t you ingrates that win prizes in online contests at least have the courtesy to share a word or two about your good luck? Can’t you help make the rest of us feel good for you, instead of moping that we lost, AGAIN?

I’m starting to think most of these contests are all a bunch of hooey. Like the guest questionnaires stores like Target and Home Depot put on the bottom of their receipts. Answer some questions and get entered in a chance to win a shopping spree. Yeah. Right. Show me someone who has actually won.

I’d give up at this point, but like any addiction, I can’t shake it. I just keep entering these stupid contests. And losing.