According to Barack Obama, the United States is not a Christian nation, yet we are a Muslim “country.” In fact, many on the left would tell you that our founding fathers wanted to keep religion out of our government completely. That, my friends, is a different discussion for different day. But, what if we discount Christian morality? What, then, do we use to gauge right and wrong? Many would say that we only have to turn to nature and observe what the animals do. Hence, right and wrong should be defined, not by what is moral, but what is natural.

Homosexuality is natural. Take a look at penguins, and you will quickly see that homosexual couples are perfectly normal. Some gay penguin couples even pretend that rocks are eggs. Isn’t that sweet? Yes, modern society frowns upon the act of homosexuality, but nature is nature. So, how then can one disagree with human homosexuality when it has been documented in nature? I guess, you can’t. One can only apologize for being so closed-minded. I feel stupid — well, ignorant to be honest. How could I have been so callous? How could I have joined in on the frowning by an uniformed society? Maybe it’s bigotry…or maybe, it’s just civility. So, let’s talk about nature.

Homosexuality is natural. Yes, and polygamy is natural, too. Did you know that, in many species, one male procreates with many females? Well, you should. That knowledge would help you to justify a lot of the problems in humanity. I mean, a man’s natural instinct is to spread his seed, so how can you credibly chastise him for that? Adultery? Polygamy? Well, they’re just natural.

Have you ever heard of competitive infanticide (look under poygany)? It’s not really a big deal, but where in some species, males will kill other younger males to perpetuate their own virility. You know, eliminate the competition, like in business. Every human male would naturally kill a young boy to stop him from copulating with females, right? So what about murder? Relax, it’s only natural.

Let’s talk about nature. I hate you. You threaten me. I will kill you. That’s natural, right? You can’t judge me for killing you, because it happens in nature in almost every species. See that young girl over there? I think I want to have sex with her. I’ll try to make it quick, because, I – am – starving! Is KFC still open? Hey, if you don’t like it, well, I’ll just kill you. No, no, and absolutely no! You cannot punish me, because who are you? My behavior is 100% natural. Check science, buddy.

Monkeys fling their own poop at each other. Of course, it’s just a natural occurrence. What human doesn’t throw poop at other people in the heat of an argument? Uh, well, the civilized ones. That’s who.

I am so sick and tired of listening to the silver-tongued devils on the left — feeding us poetic words of love and acceptance. If they want to use nature as justification, then they need to be prepared to justify a whole world of evil. They need to be ready to release every murderer, rapist, child molester and thief in prison today, because those “crimes” are not crimes at all.

You see, any level-headed liberal would inform you that these actions are, well, only natural.