As it so often seems to be the case, multiple celebrities have passed away this past week. But what is really unfortunate is that everyone seems to be concentrating on a moonwalking, face-lifted weirdo from Indiana, rather than a real American hero.
I'm talking about Billy Mays.
I know that Billy couldn't sing. He never moonwalked, or tried to buy the elephant man's bones. I don't think he ever had a pet monkey. He probably did sleep with children — his own no doubt, to comfort them during storms and things. When he wasn't on the road working to support his family.
Billy also was never married to the Six Million Dollar Man, nor Ryan Oneal. He did allow cameras into his private life though — in the form of his show "Pitchmen" on the Discovery Channel (which is having a marathon of Billy today).
Through "Pitchmen," Americans got to see a different side of Billy Mays — more than just two-minute direct sales commercials, or half-hour infomercials. We got to see that behind all those cool products, that he really did stand behind, was a hard-working guy.
I'm sure that Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson and even Ed McMahon were hardworking. And who wouldn't have loved for Ed McMahon to bring a giant check of free money to their door? But Billy Mays was different. He was a regular Joe like the rest of us. Sure, he drove a Mercedes and lived in a big house in Florida, but the guy worked his ass off to get there.
On one particular episode of "Pitchmen," Billy even got choked up talking about how he had missed a lot of his family life in his first marriage, precisely because he was out on the road, working hard. How many times did we see Ed McMahon or Michael Jackson cry because work kept them from something they loved?
People might laugh at all the "As-Seen-On-TV" stuff Billy Mays hawked. But have you used any of his products? "Pitchmen" revealed that both he and partner Anthony Sullivan are adamant that the products they represent really work. And who can deny the effectiveness of Orange Glow, Oxy Clean or Mighty Putty? Billy Mays might not have invented those products, but he put his personal stamp of approval on them, guaranteeing they worked, and were fairly priced.
Billy Mays commercials will still air for awhile. We'll still see his face on all those great products in the stores, for awhile. Even his show will linger in reruns, for awhile. But eventually, Bill will be consigned to the history books. Which is a darn shame.
Billy Mays never got accused of molesting children, or using drugs. I can't recall a single story of him going on mad, million-dollar spending sprees, or having to file bankruptcy and sell his overly-priced estate.
We should remember Billy Mays because he was a regular Joe, who worked hard, lived as best he could, and achieved the American Dream, bringing joy (and cool products) to millions. If that's not a hero worth remembering, I don't know what is.
