Okay, I keep seeing all these folks whining about solving the economic crisis. Like on the news, when someone dared to wonder why Chairman Maobama hadn't even formulated a plan yet for the bank recovery money.

Well, first off- lay off Baracknarock! Cmon people, you didn't hire him because he had experience or skills. You hired/elected him because he was black. Don't whine now that he can't do the job. That's like hiring a man with no hands to play the piano and complaining that you aren't hearing any music.

Secondly,  let's take a moment to analyze who is really suffering, economically, right now. A bunch of rich people pissing their money away on the stock markets?- failing to realize someone has to lose in order for them to win; ergo, not all investors will see gains? Or everyday folks who have to pay more for a loaf of bread, gallon of milk or cable TV?

Personally, I couldn't care less about the rich slackers who have so much money they can gamble it on stocks. Or who invested in Bernie Made-off and didn't know their money was missing until they saw it on the news. I'm more concerned about the poor schlubs losing their jobs because they get laid off.

Do folks get laid off because business is bad? Do you honestly think the number of shoppers dropped at Circuit City because their customer base took a beating on Wall Street? No, the layoffs are because the greedy corporations aren't making ENOUGH profit. Instead of being happy they are making a profit at all, the suits- who make obscene salaries for little to no work- are worried they won't be able to give out billions of dollars in bonuses. Rather than tighten their belts, they adopt a "let them eat cake" attitude and fire the minimum wage-earners in the companies. As if that is going to make a difference.

Here's the solution to the current economic "crisis": a maximum profit law. No more selling things for 1000x what it costs to make them. No more execs making 14 million dollar a year salaries while there are folks in their companies making minimum wage. I'm not calling for a communist "everybody-makes-the-same-pay" way of doing things. I'm talking about putting the same kinds of limits on businesses that loan sharks and pawn shops have- laws preventing obscene, over the top profits. If there can't be monopolies, why can there be such crazy salaries?

With less profits, items will be lower priced. That means everyday folks can buy more. And since the suits know they won't have the same gobs of cash to give themselves God-like salaries, they'll have to spread the wealth around.

That's right, I'm calling for the criminalization of greed. Just like we can't trust drunks not to drive home intoxicated, we can't leave these robber barons to follow their own internal, moral compasses. Because after years of unchecked excesses, they are lost in the wilderness.